“What are you wearing?” he asked.
She shook her head, adjusted the computer a bit, and in a slightly exasperated tone answered, “We’re not on the phone, anymore, Roger! We’re on Zoom, for Christ’s sake. Just look at your computer, will ya!”
“Oh, yeah, sorry. I just did that out of habit. So, what do we do next? This is kind of new to me,” Roger explained, a bit flummoxed .
“Well, you could say that I look nice, or something like that.”
“Sure. You look nice.” Just then he noticed some movement behind her. “Hey, what was that?”
“Just my four year old. Not a problem. You look good, too, Roger,” she continued.
“You have a four year old! I thought you were a struggling college student just using phone sex to make ends meet. Now you tell me you have a family? That’s kind of a passion killer, Louise, if that’s really your name,” he complained.
“Okay, Roger, I’ll put her in her room and turn off the television. I’ll be right back and we can try to get this right,” she replied, moving away from the computer for a few moments. He could hear muffled sounds in the background and for the first time could see group photos with her and others on the table behind where she was sitting.
“I’m back and we’re all alone, Roger. Do you want me to take off my blouse?” she purred seductively.
He didn’t say anything for a moment as she repeated her question. Then, he asked accusingly, “Who’s the guy in the photos behind you, anyway? Husband, boyfriend, your baby’s daddy, what? This just isn’t the picture I was having of you when all we did was phone sex. This isn’t my fantasy anymore.”
Just then he could hear her front door open and close and a male voice in the background yelled out, “Hey, who you got on the computer now?”
She yelled back, “Oh, it’s just Roger, honey! We’ll be done in a jiff.”
He could hear a loud guffaw from the male voice and what sounded like, “Tell him thanks for helping with the rent” or something like that.
“So, Roger, where were we? Oh, yeah, my blouse. I’m unbuttoning it now, slowly, and you can see that I’m licking my lips, too, baby. You feeling in the mood, my big strong Roger?” she went on seductively.
“Whoa! Wait, wait. This isn’t working anymore, Louise! You now have a kid and a man in the same house where we’re supposed to be getting intimate with each other. Not sexy, Louise, not sexy at all!” Roger went on.
“Maybe you just need to see a little more of me to get you in the mood, Roger?” she added, peeling off her mini skirt. “Now, how’s that? Feeling in the mood, Roger?” As she waited for his answer, she adjusted her wig a bit.
“Oh, no! You’re wearing a wig! Oh, my god, this is just ridiculous! How old are you really, Louise? Tell me right now or I’m gone for good. No more Roger baby to make a fool out of anymore, Louise. How old are you really?” he demanded.
Reluctantly, Louise slowly removed her wig revealing a closely-cropped crown of grey hair. And at the same time, she removed her false eyelashes. “That better, Roger? Now you know the real me. Did I ever ask you how old you were, Roger? But, what the Hell, I’m pushing fifty-five, big boy. That was my granddaughter and my youngest son who you heard before.”
“Fifty-five, Louise, really?” Roger said, his voice a bit more conciliatory. “You know, my mother is about that age.”
Something clicked in Louise’s mind and she cautiously replied, “Now, Roger, why haven’t you found a nice girl to settle down with, hmmm?”
Roger hung his head for a moment and then answered, “I’m trying, mother, I’m trying.”
“Good boy, Roger,” Louise replied. “Now, move closer to the computer screen, Roger.”
As he did, Louise moved her right breast close to the screen of her computer and in a low, soothing voice said, “Good boy, Roger, good boy. Momma loves her good boy.”