The man was escorted to the podium by the FBI and left alone there, all by himself. He watched as the agents left and with a great deal of uncertainty as he approached the microphone. “Hi, I’m Jerome, uh, Jerome Nesbit,” he announced hesitantly. “They just told me I’m the new President of the United States and maybe some of you recognize me. I was the Acting Under Secretary of Veterans Affairs until this morning. And I really have no idea what's going on.”
The White House reporter for Fox News stood up and taking the microphone from the assistant, said, “Sir, you were the last one standing in the line of succession. Everyone else was caught up in the Bloomberg scandals. Everybody else is going to prison, Mr. President. You have a clean slate! You have complete power to remake the Federal Government and set the new agenda!”
Nesbit breathed deeply and looked around the room nervously and then said, “Look, I graduated from Eastern Illinois University in 1997 with a degree in Communications. I went into the Army and got lucky in Afghanistan. Silver Star, and all that. But I’m really uncomfortable with this whole President of the United States thing, you know. This is a big deal and I don’t think I’m the guy to take it on.”
From the wings emerged a tall man, dressed immaculately in an expensive silk suit and sporting a five hundred dollar haircut. He nudged Nesbit aside a bit and announced, “What President Nesbit is trying to convey is that he is prepared to work incredibly hard to reunite this country, to clean-up the mess left by the former Administration, and to move forward into a bold new future for our great country.”
“Who are you?” came a question from the third row.
“I’m a good friend of President Nesbit’s. Someone whom he has asked to be by his side during this difficult transition period.”
Another question was yelled out, “Yes, but what’s your name and what’s your job?”
The well-coiffed man smiled, put his arm around the new President, and answered, “I work for Mark at Facebook. My name is not important, but I’m the vice president in charge of the News Feed Division.”
End